I’ve been inboxed on a few different occassions because of content I’ve posted on Facebook. One instance was because of a political post that resulted in the person telling me how wrong I was.
I don’t mind being told I’m wrong. I also don’t mind having a healthy debate. It didn’t seem like the content I posted was about either of those. Their inbox seemed to use the content as a way to express things they had been wanting to say for a while; including them saying I post too much about race related issues.
Ehhhh, that part about me not minding being told I’m wrong kind of doesn’t apply when a white person “inboxes” me to say I post too much about race related issues. If you don’t understand why, I’ll be happy to discuss. The discussion ended with me declining an invitation to go to their house. Now that they had shown me who they are, I was part paranoid and part emotionally immature to have a conversation with them in THEIR home.
Fast forward a few years to an event where they meet Michai and weirdly watch him eat chicken wings. They publicly invite us to their home and I pull out my planner to say, “I should have some time on an off weekend from football so just let me know.” I thought they would either see how much I had in the planner and give me a break, or forget. The invite appeared via text and I reluctantly accepted. I knew it would be awkward, but I also knew that in order to raise my emotional intelligence and be an example for Michai, I needed to face these things head on.
On the way over, I talked to Michai about checking his facial expressions, thinking before he speaks and not getting a lot of food in the event he doesn’t like it (y’all remember what he said about those collards). He then asks if they season their food? I told him that was a stereotype, don’t ask them and we’ll find out in a few minutes.
We arrive and see one of the hosts in the backyard donned in their BBQ apron. Another host in the front yard with some teens, one of whom looks at Michai like they’ve not ever seen anyone who looks like him. I see Michai’s reaction and say through my teeth, “Fix your face!”
Inside is a nice, quaint interior and more children. I could tell a difference between the ones who were currently homeschooled (one of them is still staring at Michai) and those who are in public school. The BBQ host comes in and thanks us for coming and tells us what’s on the menu. They name salad, salad dressings, fruit, chicken with no seasoning and chicken with a little lemon pepper on it. Michai almost cracked my rib after elbowing me and I almost passed out from trying to hold my laugh in. I wanted to say we were vegetarians but they had just watched Michai slaughter some wings months earlier. Plus I didn’t want to lie…in front of Michai. 🤷🏾♀️
The kids were really interested in Michai and his hair, and he was really interested in their pet reptiles. I was interested in finding the right time to say, “Aight, Imma head out.” As we walked to the car, the look on Michai’s face made me speak through my teeth again to say something I’ve been telling him since he could talk, “Don’t you say a word until we get in car!” In the car he said, “A sterotype huh?” I remained silent.
https://www.instagram.com/p/B6ompy1A8Vl/?igshid=1w8j0apgtuz1m
I really hate how much I audibly hear and visually see you saying things…I cannot with you!!
🤷🏾♀️
This is why your posts are necessary because learning to think before I speak has been a challenge in my adult life, but it’s a work in progress. I swear I sat here trying trying to not laugh as if I’m standing in front of these people…..Ha keep them coming